Friend Lists

Do you have your Facebook friends divided into lists? I am a maniac when it comes to lists — I love making lists. So my friends are not only categorized by list, but they are broken into lists to an almost obsessive degree. But between my real friends, and coworkers at my “day job,” and fans of my photography who I don’t really know, and potential models or photo subjects, I kind of feel like I have to be like this.

Still, I know that I am list crazy and I always thought that if I confessed this, people would be horrified. But when I had dinner last week with a friend who told me that he has five different Friend Lists (Tier One through Tier Five, each with different levels of access to his posts), I thought that maybe I’m not so alone, after all.

Here’s the breakdown of my Friend Lists:

• A Friends: These are my tried and true, friends with a capital F. My A List friends know me well, know my secrets, etc. They are my “besties,” if you’ll excuse my talking like a 14-year-old for a minute.

• B Friends: These are the friends that I am close enough with that I have their numbers in my cell phone and we occasionally hang out, text, have dinner, etc.

• C Friends: Acquaintances, the people I know well enough to greet by name and converse with when I see them at a party or out in public, but I don’t really hang out with them.

• D Friends: People I have met, but don’t really “know.”

• E Friends: People I have talked to online, but have not met.

• F Friends: People that I don’t know who sent me a friend request. (I accept pretty much everybody, because of the photography business.)

• Guys I’d Like to Shoot: Anyone who I have added or talked to that I’d like to photograph, sometime. (In hindsight, I should rename this list because there are also women on it.)

• Past Photo Subjects: Anyone who I’ve photographed in the past.

• Photo Shoots that Didn’t Happen: People that I was going to photograph but didn’t. They got nervous and backed out, or for some reason we decided not to go ahead with the shoot.

• Photographers and Artists: Other photographers who I learn from and admire, artists who inspire me, gallery owners, people who make a living in art, etc.

• Prudes: This list exists mostly for my family and for coworkers that I am not close to but who sent me a friend request. This list is locked down and those on it can’t really see anything on my Facebook page. I get along better with my Republican family when they don’t see the political articles I post, and while my employer and coworkers know about my photography business, I prefer to keep those two thing separated.

• Stalkers: There have been a handful of people who added me as a friend and became way too familiar too fast, or started showing up at places I checked in to, or posting excessively on my page. This list is for people who didn’t do anything creepy enough to be defriended but who I decided to steer clear from. They also can’t see anything on my page.

In a way, writing all of this out makes me feel like I spend too much time compartmentalizing people. But if you’re like me and have a lot of Facebook connections, and have them for myriad reasons like work and photography and your real life, Friend Lists really are helpful. There are times when I’ve wanted to contact all of my past subjects at once, or all of the guys I’d like to shoot, or tell all of my best friends some news, or ask all of the photographers I know for a bit of advice. For that, I think Friend Lists are good.